It's raining ...

Our first winter storm is here ... well fall storm, I guess. I'm wondering how this winter is going to be with kids in the house every day. lol How long will grandma stay sane? The blend of these kids is interesting to say the least. I marvel sometimes at how different my approach is compared to how I raised my kids ... I wish I'd been more "mature" when I had my kids ... maybe I wouldn't have broken so many wooden spoons. hahaha

This weekend we're planning a trip to Moonrocks, a place outside of Reno with Emily and Mikaela and the toys. It's hard to stay hopeful with so much wind and rain though. This is a new place and there's not as much sand as Sand Mountain or Winnemucca so we won't need to borrow Lesley and Bryce's truck ... but all this rain could make it difficult if it turned the roads to mud. We're keeping our fingers crossed, that's for sure!

Here's what our front yard looks like ... good thing we have a canoe, eh?

Melancholy time of year ...

This has been a difficult time of year for me for about the last 30 some odd years. It's never been a favorite time season wise for me because spring and summer were always my seasons. It wasn't until about 15 years ago that I found out that I'm one of those who are affected by the lack of sun throughout winter.

But 32 years ago my father passed away. It was and still is, the hardest thing I've ever tried to live through and recover from. I also lost my first horse in September. That was pretty devastating also. Add all those separate things together and it makes it easier to understand why this time of year brings about a case of melancholy for me.

My dad used to call this feeling the mully grumps. Mully grumps were something where you're just sad and a little lost. Sometimes you don't know why and that makes it very hard to understand where the feeling(s) come from ... sometimes you do know but it's still hard to understand.

This year is one of the years where I find myself having a true case of the mully grumps. I just got a phone call from my very best friend in the world that her husband isn't doing well. He's been battling health issues for the last few years and has given her (and me) a few scares ... but really had seemed to be holding his own more recently. So her phone call Sunday was an unwelcome bit of news. She was so upset ... scared ... lost ... worried about him ... worried about herself ... and I find myself totally falling back into old patterns.

I want to fix this for her.

I need to make it better and ease her worries. I find myself sleepless at night because ... I'm very sure ... I can't fix it. All I can do is be here ... try to be strong for her ... and love her. Do you ever wonder if that's enough? I do ... all the time.

I read an article in People magazine about Patrick Swayze. What a heroic person he was. He lived his life his way, right up to the end. My heart aches for what his wife Lisa must be going through right now. How incredibly strong she must be to have stood beside him throughout his illness ... how wonderfully blessed they were to have had each other.

It makes me take stock of my life ... my loved ones ... my husband. Does he know how much I love and depend on him for his strength ... his love ... his friendship. Times like this make me think about his parents and their health ... how frail they seem this year. Their 60th wedding anniversary is next week and I can't imagine what it must be like to have lived with someone that long. Howard and I are at 37 years, and I can't even begin to picture a life without him.

Where does the strength come from? Will I have the courage and faith that Patrick Swayze's wife does? That Howard's parents have?

The mully grumps ... they are visiting again. Maybe it's time to give them a new name.

Time flies!!

When you're having fun, right? I can't believe it's been so long since I remembered to update this. Real life has just been so darn busy. :D

Christmas came and went in a flash of light it seems. We had our last family get together the middle of January with our "rent-a-daughter" and her family near Santa Rosa. Talk about a zoo! Howard and I took our trailer, Lesley and Bryce took theirs, and we had Doug, Tara, Elliot, Charlie, Emily, and Mikaela with us. Add that to Blaine and Joe with their four Peter, Brie, Jordan and Tessa and you have a real life zoo. Kids running everywhere, parents trying to keep track, oldies like Howard and I trying to keep up and block out some of the noise and confusion. (Pretty much 100% impossible though. lol)

Now that spring is here and the weather is finally turning nice, I've found that the new knees have opened doors that have been firmly shut to me for years and years. I'm outside almost every day mowing grass, raking leaves, playing with the horses, taking turns around the back pasture in my Rhino to run some of the energy out of our "puppy". Yesterday she (Willow the 120 pound *cough* puppy) decided that two laps around the back pasture deserved a side trip into the water trough. Apparently it's warm enough that she can only run for about 5 minutes without needing to take a dip. I'm seriously going to have to get a camera out and take her picture when she does that. She leaps in and then just sinks down til only her nose and eyes are out and there she lays, in all her glory. :)

Lesley and Bryce (our youngest daughter and hubby) are finding out what it's like to have a houseful of their own. About a month ago they had two sisters placed with them. The older one is 4, younger one is 16 months old. About the time they were settling in with those two, the little girl they had last summer was brought back into the system and they got the call to see if they would take her again also. /faint !! So now they have a 16 month old, a 2½ yr old and a 4 yr old. Poor Bryce is surrounded by females! (Even their dog is female hahaha) Lesley is finding it a challenge sometimes to get out of the house in a timely manner and has said more than once "Mom, I don't know how you did it!". I think it's a bit easier to deal with when you don't get three all at once. As hard as it was for me when they were all little ... at least I had a few months in between to learn how to cope.

Last weekend we took the trailers to the sand dunes just north of Winnemucca, Nevada and had an absolute ball with the ATV's. I just love my Rhino and now that Bryce has added the back seat, gramma races all over the hills with the grandkids. The funniest part of the weekend was the baby falling asleep in the back seat, not just once but twice. Bouncing around all over the sand dunes ... all the noise of the different engines and she just zonked out. Lesley said she wished that happened in the truck as easily. hahaha

Time for bed, but I plan to try keeping this more current again! lol